A day before yesterday, I received an anonymous sms asking for my email. Personally I don't like anonymous sms. I hate anonymous phone call and heck I sure hate somebody who call and when I insist to know who is she / he, the answer would be like " Kita pernah jumpala dulu", or "Saya ni dulu bekas awek awak la ...*giggle" or " Sanggup awak lupakan saya?" and all the silly answers except THEIR NAME! I'll went "Eh eh, apebendela diorang ni". Sometimes I just ignore if the same number keep calling or I'll just sms them and ask who they are. Ape salahnya mulakan perbualan dengan "Assalamualaikum, Rul, ni akula si polan bin polan. Member ko masa kat USM dulu". Haa..kan senang. The guessing game will only make the conversation more annoying, wasting your credit and REALLY piss me off! So please la..

For a guy who is about to get engage on the 6th of May, my preparation for it is still zero! So far the only thing that I had bought was the engagement ring. (Luckily I bought it early since the price of gold dah naik!). Pihak perempuan katanya nak kasi 11 dulang. So traditionally I need to reply at least 9. So let see..

• One engagement ring - Check!
• Sirih junjung (ke julang! haha) - Kena carik
• Satu baju sepersalinan (ke kain?) - Mak aku sponsor
• Kek - Tiramisu ok x?
  
• Sejadah - Aku kena gi beli ngan mak aku
• Telekong - Pun aku kena gi beli ngan mak aku
• Kasut - Ikut hati nak kasi satu dulang sebelah :P
• Beg - Tali satu dulang, beg satu dulang :))
• Duit tanda - RM50. Kena gubah ni
• Tuala - Dia cakap kalau tak kasik x mandi (sabo jelah)
• Coklat - Ferrero Rochee (tak sempat nak hias, habis!)
• Minyak wangi - Adik aku sponsor hehehe
  

1,2,3..uik. Dah 12 dulang la plak. Macam mana la leh terlebih ni?

Kurt Cobain
1967 - 1994

That's was written on his suicide note found beside his body on 5th April 1994. During my younger days, Kurt Cobain was my inspiration. Why? I don't know. Maybe because somehow I can related all the bitterness in his life with mine. The way he channeled all his feelings through music inspired me to form a band, Staircase and later on Butterfly Kiss. Grunge is the name of the game and my 3 piece band did rock the jamming studios way back in Ipoh. I still remember a jam session that went out of control when out of nowhere some kids (who also waiting their turn to jam) suddenly join us and head banging to the tune of our song. The jamming studio had suddenly turns into a mini gig! Cool gila! His untimely death came when Nirvana is at it's peak and did take me for a while to accept that he is gone. To me he's a legend. Cheers to you Kurt. Finally you are in peace.

:: Smells Like Teen Spirit




:: Come As You Are

I cherish and value a friendship. I still remember my old correspondence back in younger days at my secondary school. (Well my school is an all boys school except for the matric gurls!) And do you believe it I went through and doing a lot of things so that I can again keep in touch with them. No..seriously! I've tried Friendster, YM, Mirc, and even went through the net seeking them by using Yahoo or Google. I even went through my old letters in my box just to search for any hints of phone numbers, email or even their home address. (Since most of the time I sent the letter to their school). And believe or not I found some of them! hehe :

Noraizam binti Ahmad Bhari - My correspondence since 1992, lost when I enroll for my matriculation course. She went to UK to further her studies. Found last month using Friendster. Married. Just gave birth to a bouncing baby boy early this month. Congrats!

Norailin binti Sanit - My correspondence since 1995. Still in contact until she married in 2002. Found her in a list of friends from a friend in Friendster early this year. Already had 2 daughters. (Is it 3?)

Shazrina Armiyanti binti Noor Azman - My akak angkat wayyyyyyyyy back in 1994. Lost contact due to my inability to buy a decent hp to store her phone numbers! (hehe) or is it because she keep changing her phone numbers? (Jangan marah kak) Now this time she found me. Macam mana tu lupa plak nak tanya. But it's good to know she's still around.

I felt bless because in a way I still have these wonderful persons. Whether or not they value me as much is up to them because no matter what, I value all my friends that much.

Have you ever felt that you like a girl and you are so convinced that this girl also like you but when you have the courage to ask she would say "No. I never felt that way towards you."

Junizah, Atiqah, Tati, Aida, Izan, Noreen some of the name that can be associated to the question above. Devastated, crushed and frustrated are always the after effect that I felt and it always had an effect on my self-esteem.

A friend did ask me the question above and it reminds me of all the bitter road that I went through.

*sigh...It still hurts..

Ah yes. Book. An invention that didn't need to be introduced. Anybody with a sane mind and can read knows what is a book (What the hell I'm babbling about?!)

Anyway for the first time in my entire life I've bought a self motivation book. Entitled "100 ways to motivate yourself" by Steve Chandler, I first "steal-reading" (ada ke?) this book at a coffee shop here. The interesting part is the reader; she works there. Bukan memandang rendah pada sesiapa tapi terus terang cakapla, di sini susah sangat nak jumpa orang Melayu baca something like this. Selalu novel cintan cintun tak pun komik Dragon Ball ke. So far I only manage to went through the opening page. (Yelah, baru beli pagi tadi!). Maybe later at night, I can continue reading it (Or maybe after reading Maxim :P)

This is my sister's wedding pictures. Too many to upload. This is some of the pictures that sempat diuploadkan. Kalau sempat nanti tambah lagi. The wedding took place at my home on Sunday, 4th March 2007. It's fun and the crowd was..lebih dari budget! hahaha...luckily the nasi beriani darat and the lauk was enough for all. Serius..penat gile bila majlis dah habis!

P/S : This skin doesn't have a comment link. Since I'm just busy (or plain lazy!) to search for the html coding, feel free to comment on the shout box.

I'll probably went bankcrupt by now! You know why? Because with all the advertising the TMnet Streamyx did, it is still sangat SLOWWWWW!! Not mention the connection problem that been haunting my office since the earthquake at Taiwan. Rasa macam nak cabut and then lambung to the gaung jek my modem!!

P/S : Still searching for a suitable upload domain. myfilehut.com seems to have problems regarding their SQL being blocked or something. Any suggestions?

I used to have a great friend. She is gorgeous, minah gedik, but importantly kind. She has a dark secret. She is a widow*, left by her husband for another woman. From this marriage she had a daughter. Cute, beautiful and innocent. (*Yet it is impossible to understand what is the real condition of her marriage.) She still sees this sore loser, slept with him, get beaten and sees him again all because this guy promise that he will hand over her daughter. And it keep going for more than 2 years. And the only time she can see her daugther is when she meet this sore loser. To make things a lot more complicated than it is, her marriage is not registered at the Pejabat Agama since they've got married at Thailand, making it even harder for her to fight for custody of her daughter since sijil nikah presumably still in the hands of her ex hubby. ( A kind advice for women out there : kahwin la kat Malaysia. Ikutla prosedur. Jangan ikutkan nafsu serakah jek. Fikir nak mudah jek. Bila dan jadi macam ni sape susah? )

So throughout those hardship she endure, I'm the only thing a best friend she ever had. The close bond between me and her did spawn a lot of hardship for me ( I can never forget how a colleague of mine accuses me of sleeping with her at the office doing "things"), yet I believed in her and appreciate her as a friend.

Fast forward to today. A lot had happened since. She is now married to a friend of mine. The funny thing was he believed I want to court her (talk about extreme insecurity!) and thus forbided her to see me at all! What a f**king moron!. And the thing that hurt me the most was, she didn't invite me at all for her wedding..

Kadang-kadang aku terfikir apakah kesusahan yang dilalui bersama tidak memberi sebarang makna bila sudah bertemu mereka yang sanggup menyayangi? Bukan aku meminta untuk berkongsi kasih atau katil :P, anggap sahaja aku sebagai seorang sahabat yang sentiasa ada ketika susah atau senang. Kesiankan aku..

p/s : For some unknown reason, my mp3 player for this blog seems to skip the songs I've uploaded. Needs a little more tweaking I guess. Sorry kalau menyakitkan telinga. Tekan jek "Pause"

Hmm..Well hello..For some unknown reason I've decided to blog a new. Maybe because I'm just plain bored with my last blog. Maybe because it just plain dull or simply the blog had lost it focus. I remember the first time I blog, the moment I typed the first word on it is actually to express myself. To tell anybody who cares to even read the entry. It's fun and I really enjoyed blogging those days. There's always something to share or write and right now I think I need a new sense of directions. Hope you like what you see and love what you read. Tuledooo..

p/s : as you can see the page is still in disarray. I'm trying to correct a lot of things about the skin (but that will have to wait since I got a lot work need to be done first..:P )